Hello folks.

You join us in Manchester Academy production office, just prior to theAudition going onstage.

Hello folks.

You join us in Manchester Academy production office, just prior to theAudition going onstage.

Things are going well in tour-world, today a small red football was purchased,  and booted around the venue. Miraculously it didn’t break anything, partly due to the magnetic-feet of our 3 friends, and partly due to sheer luck. Especially when you consider at one point, the aim of the game was to hit a round glass window at the far end of the hall. Sorry Manchester Academy. We didn’t break it though.

So… I think I last updated the diary in Bristol, so to update you, since then we’ve experienced the following:

6 hour delays at Glasgow Airport (Myself)
Nosebleeds at 4am (Adam)
Un-succesful trainer shopping expeditions (Ben)
Minimal Hours of Sleep (everyone except Churd)
8am Load-ins (Churd and Colin)
Utter, Utter Whiteys (Gordon) **
Weird phonecalls from over-zealous fans (Myself)
Many guestlist requests (everyone)
Lost Series 3 (Simon, Adam and Myself)

** ‘The Whitey’ – there are two forms of whitey, closely tied together, but with significant distinction.

The first, is usually experienced after an extreme intake of such a substance that can render one incoherent, and inebriated. The Whitey occurs, when the volume of substance that has been subject to said intake, becomes to great, and the poor sorry bastard who experiences The Whitey, is overcome with unpleasant feeling, usually resulting in unconsciousness, vomit, blood-loss, a pale exterior, and tears. And often all of the above, coupled with morning-after apologies, and a 24 hour period of feeling like what can only be described as a ‘discarded husk of the man he used to be’.

The second version, and this is the one Gordon experienced (though he came close to the first on one occasion as well) is when you think you may be responsible for, be it inadvertently or directly, for a serious fuck-up, one that could affect the tour, or those on the tour. The Whitey can be compounded by a lack of knowledge of whether or not a problem really exists, the prospect of a problem arising, can often be far worse than the actual problem itself. It’s the not knowing.

This is the worst kind of Whitey. 

A variation on this Whitey, can also be an incident that you can see might possibly occur… this is the pre-emptive Whitey.

Dictionary lesson over.

Welcome back to those who skipped the lengthy explanation of ‘tour patter’… (Patter = banter, chat etc)

So yeah…

Manchester Academy 1… first time Biffy have headlined this place, which is quite exciting… it’s kinda like a Glasgow Barrowland or London Astoria, but in Manchester.

We’ve done the Academy 3 a million times (well, 5 or 6), and the Academy 2 last time we played (which should have actually been Academy 1, had the promoter a. Had Faith, and b. not booked Nightwish in there afterwards… Guitar Tech Churd is a big Nightwish fan actually… we still love him though)

but anyway… it’s exciting that the band get to headline it finally. It actually closes in a few weeks or so, to be refurbished, which should be cool, as they could do with a new backstage facility at the very least…

What else…

We had a bit of a party night in Nottingham a few nights ago… some friends from other bands came down for the occasion, which was lovely… Colin, Larry, Andy and Andy from Hundred Reasons, and Chris from Editors were all lifting some drinks with us,  alongside other friends old and new. The Bronx also showed us how to do it, by making short work of the bottle of Makers Mark we gave them as a thank you for carrying a bit of our backline (the band’s equipment and gear) from Cardiff to Bristol before our equipment van arrived.

The Bronx are still blowing us away every night… they’re stupid-fucking-good, and lovely people to a man.

They even persuaded un-named members of the touring party to take a venture out to what I’m told was a fairly grim Southampton strip club… Wednesday night in Southampton… not exactly going to be the ‘first-team’ squad on display I’d imagine… That said, it was a fun when they returned to regale us with stories.


The Bronx are onstage soon… so I’m going to go have a look.

word out.x